How's Your EI? Are You in Control of Your EQ? Let's Evaluate!

Written by Flor Paredes Mattos

18 Aug 2022

A dose of intellectual intelligence is insufficient to succeed in your professional life. A good balance of academic and emotional intelligence EI (otherwise known as emotional quotient or EQ) is key to your success where ever you find yourself.

When do you start developing emotional intelligence? As soon as you are born.

As a child, you depend on your parents to care for you and give you the primary personal education you need. During this critical period in your life, you learn how to process your emotions and develop a sense of right and wrong. The attention you receive from your parents, the forms of communication, and your relationship with them are significant…

The love and attention you receive as a child sets the stage for a good dose of emotional intelligence.

As you enter your teens, you start discovering what you like in life and what kind of person you would like to be. You can make your own decisions and take care of yourself. This is when your parents see the results of the love, time, and attention they gave you. They support your decisions and continue guiding you in the right direction.

A healthy relationship with your parents is key to the challenges we encounter as adults…

When do you start needing emotional intelligence?

As an adult, you prepare as much as possible to join the workforce. This is a phase when interdependence kicks in. Being able to build relationships with not only students or teachers but with colleagues and your superiors. It is now when you require emotional intelligence to deal with whatever challenges come your way…

You will find yourself dealing with different people at work, which can be very positive, but it can also be tricky and stressful; you can feel overwhelmed and maybe even insecure. This is when you realize that a dose of intellectual intelligence is not enough to cope with all the changes in your life…

What happens when we lack emotional intelligence?

Sometimes it can take a while before you recognize the signs of low emotional intelligence. It can be during a significant change in your life, for example, a divorce, losing your job, losing a loved one, or when you finally decide to leave your “comfort zone.”

You encounter difficulties building relationships with a partner or your colleagues and superiors. It's hard to understand the emotions of others and yourself. You lack empathy. Not only that, but you tend to blame others for problems at work and have emotional outbursts.

Having someone who listens to you with patience is the first step.

Identifying your lack of emotional intelligence and then working to understand what the causes of this are is key to personal growth. We look at the past to understand the present.

Work on how to manage negative emotions, communicate, and show empathy (understand before you are understood).

To develop your emotional intelligence, you must be willing to confront yourself in your past and present. Your emotional intelligence can grow as long as you desire to increase it.